This weekend, I learned of a distant family member who was my age, living in a homeless shelter, & died unexpectedly due to taking some form of drugs. This news has really upset me, reminding me of how hard life can be on anyone.
With that in mind, this weekend alone - I spilled an entire gallon of sweet tea on my kitchen floor while holding a screaming Nolan. I said a "bad" word, which Peyton repeated, & that crushed my spirit. I was 30 minutes late to Sunday School & was supposed to teach the lesson. I struggled to worship, due to my frustration with myself being late to church. My attitude was not in check this weekend. In the meantime - I needed to parent. Nolan had needs - eating, changing, sleeping. Peyton had needs - consistent discipline, consistent schedule (he is his mama - he loves routine!), continued work on healthy eating, etc. I was very aware parenting "takes a village," without my husband, I do not know how I could manage (& I greatly admire those who single parent). I was very aware parenting takes LOTS of prayer - for the parents & the children.
To you my blogger readers - I LOVE my boys with all my heart. But, it is HARD to parent. I question my decisions, my actions, my time spent with my family wanting to make it the BEST, most memorable at all times. I am learning - it is a learning process full of mistakes & lessons learned. For some reason, I felt I needed to share my struggles...we all have them, don't we?
Happy moments caught on our cell phones -
Nolan loving the fall weather! |
Peyton playing with Nolan at the hotel in St. Simons |
Dark but sweet photo w/ Lindsay Salapka: LOVED time with her! |
Nolan asleep on the play yard! |
Susan -
ReplyDeleteCouldn't have said it better myself :). Just know that you have a kindred spirit up in Cincinnati going through much of the same things. Your boys are precious, and I am positive you are a phenomenal mother! Love to you all.
-Leslie
Thank you for your transparency! I'm not a parent, but this post is so relatable!
ReplyDeleteYou keep on keeping on! You and Jonathan are raising wonderful children - my grandsons! I'm thankful they have you 2 as parents!
ReplyDeleteLove you all!
mom